25 things I've learned in 25 years

I couldn't sleep on Tuesday night and did what anyone (I hope) might do, I stalked myself on Instagram. I landed on my birthday post from 2017. A peek into Sarah at 23: "This year has been incredibly transformational for me, and I am in the midst of the biggest transition of my life- from home to my own. New York. This list includes things I learned long before this past year, but have become top of mind to me in this year especially. I wrote them in under 10 minutes, so there is no order, organization, or theme but I suppose that's life for you. I loved writing it." 

Everything I wrote then still applies (wear sunscreen people!!), and I'm just a few months post move 2.0. Back in California, this time with a San Francisco zip code. I wrote these 25 things quickly from my bed in my small room on Union St at bit past 12am. The things I've learned feel a bit heavier than they did at 23, but they also ring very true. 

25 things I have learned in 25 years 

1. Write down all your ideas, it’s the best way to get the good ones to stick and the bad ones to melt away 
2. Walk to or from work whenever possible, you always feel better after 
3. Don’t beat yourself up about buying a latte every day before work, but you really shouldn't make it a habit 
4. Flossing is your friend 
5. Under eye cream is great for your lips and lips need SPF like everything else!
6. 25 is about damn time to start using more natural products. Yes, it’s worth it 
7. Periodically clearing out old photos from your phone is a lovely mental cleanse, but don’t just delete or just dwell 
8. You are likely going to have many more years of big change to come- don’t confuse that with instability or a lack of progress. Pivots still mean forward motion! 
9. It’s always the right decision to be the person who gives up their seat on the bus or Bart 
10. Not being able to explain how or why you feel something does not make it any less valid- you’ll figure it out or it will pass 
11. The Mari Kondo folding method WORKS & drawer cubes WORK 
12. You will always feel better after yoga, but it’s ok to have an off day and fall over in the middle of class
13. No one is looking at you on the bus (probably) so chill out already 
14. You don’t need to like everyone, and everyone doesn’t need to like you (still working on this but I know it’s true)
15. You need to make plans to not have plans
16. It is hard work to figure out who you are- luckily most people haven’t done it yet, so stop thinking that they have and you’re behind 
17. Finish a product or bottle or consumable good before you buy the next one. Unless it’s probiotics, then always have back up 
18. Handwritten notes are still, and always will be, the best 
19. It’s ok for engagement and wedding posts to freak you out a bit, but their happiness does not diminish the power of yours 
20. There is nothing scary about baked goods or butter- never feel guilty for eating what you want or crave. There is no “worth it”. 
21. There is a difference between caution and skepticism. Always be optimistic but cautious when you need to be- there’s a way to be both 
22. You really do need to salt pasta water. A lot. 
23. ~signs~ really are a thing, but you don’t need to take them at face value 
24. Hydration is quite literally the key to everything 
25. As it turns out, your life really can change in a minute 

Eggs

There’s a scene in Runaway Bride where in Richard Gere’s big rom com speech to Julia Roberts he accuses her of not knowing how she likes her eggs. He says you just conform and ‘have what he’s having’ (he being her current fiancé) and, as such, she doesn’t actually know who she is. So as any rom com heroine would do, she goes through a montage of cooking and tasting each type of egg there is. Then in her big rom com speech to Richard Gere she triumphantly declares “I love eggs Benedict, I hate every other kind”. And that’s that! Self, considered yourself discovered. What I’m trying to say is, if only everything were eggs.

There is no doubt that I’ve been a bad decision maker in my day. It’s pretty classic Sarah to debate between two flavors of ice-cream (rocky road or coffee) and then panic at the last minute and order something totally different (rainbow sherbet). Ice cream is a pretty harmless example, but it’s not an isolated one. I struggle to make choices, especially ones that are relatively insignificant. What color dress should I buy? Where do you want to go to dinner? Do I actually like these shoes? Sure, none of those choices are do or die, but I know that really this inability to decide and say what I want are superficial signs of not actually knowing myself very well. Besides, it annoys the hell out of the people in my life. Especially because my default is ‘whatever you want!” in response to most questions, even when do have an opinion. Issue being, I would rather avoid conflict than get what I think I want. I say think because truthfully I’m probably not sure if Thai food IS what I want for dinner.

I read an article recently that centered around the term ‘confusion’, based on advice for someone who was the victim of another person’s confusion/inaction/laziness/selfishness. I happen to have a foot in both camps, both the confused person and the one who has felt totally vulnerable waiting on someone else to make up their mind about me. It’s not fair either way. In the article the author suggests to not tolerate confusion until the “guy walks straight up to you and uses his words to say: “I want to be your boyfriend and nothing else will do”. Damn. I react so strongly to other people’s declarations, yet I STRUGGLE to do the same, even down to silly things. “Just tell me what you want” is something I’ve gotten multiple times, and god I wish I could. This brings me back full circle to the first issue of not really knowing myself well enough to know what I want to begin with.

I’m rambling, let’s bring it back to eggs. The eggs formula is a two part success: 1. methodically going through choices with an unbiased view 2. when you decide what you want you actually share it and act on it. “I love eggs Benedict, I hate every other kind.” Even with a script like she has, I’m not sure I could do it for fear of being rejected, being wrong, or regretting it. We're back to square one. 

So friends, I wish I could tie this up in a nice little bow with a solution on top, but I can’t. I wish I could say wake up each morning, look in the mirror and repeat “I like my eggs *insert your preference here*” but honestly, I think I would just end up hungry. Here is what I can do. I’m going to try and break things down like Julia Roberts did with her eggs. I’m not talking ice cream flavors here (boy would that hold up a line) but the bigger things. Write down everything involved in the decision, rank importance, and then practice saying out loud what it is that makes it important to you. But note, you don’t have to justify your opinions to anyone else.

The other thing I’m going to do is to try and stop asking for help on these decisions, and really listen to my gut and my own logic. I fall into the trap of letting someone else’s opinion lead mine, and it devalues my opinions- even if they don’t mean it that way and even if I asked for their input to begin with. I need to be the one scrambling the eggs and living with the results. Fine, fine enough with the egg metaphors.

Moral of the story is listen to yourself. Your voice manifests in many different ways and it will get quieter and quieter if no one is listening to it.  Find people who you feel comfortable flexing this new decision muscle with and treat them to some ice cream for being patient with you. Saying thank you to them instead of sorry will get you far, but that’s a memo for another day.

With love and whisks,

Sarah Belle

Berry healthy pancakes

These berry healthy (aren't I punny??) pancakes are direct from my Instagram feed to your plate. Easy to make, filling, and no pricey or hard to find ingredients... the perfect productive thing for your lazy weekend morning. Plus, they're pretty.

What you'll need: 

the basics

1 Banana

2 Eggs

Frozen/fresh berries

~1/2 cup flaxseed

Rolled Oats 

the extras

1 TBS Maca powder

Collagen powder

Chia Seeds

the sprinkles

Yogurt

Apples

Granola

Nuts

Coconut Chips

How to:

1. Add all of the basic & extra ingredients to a blender (or in a bowl with a strong armed whisk)
2. Blend until smooth & creamy (thick like a milkshake, add more flaxseed or oats to thicken)
3. Add ~1 TBS coconut oil to a large plan and add a big ol' dollop of batter
4. Heat is key- medium high, better to slow cook than to burn and cook unevenly!
5. Remove the cakes, top with your sprinkles
6. Take a pic, you know you want to. 

With love and sleeping in, 

Sarah Belle

Zucchini bread, health level: medium

Well hello, happy Sunday! How are you? It's been a while, and I've missed you. That's me talking to this zucchini bread, because it was just that good. Aren't I funny?? But seriously this bread was just the right sweetness, dense but still fluffy, and just enough health factor to justify eating an undisclosed amount while watching Riverdale alone.
I made some amendments to this recipe to fit with what I already had in my pantry, solidifying my belief that applesauce and bananas solve most life problems. Eat up!!

What you will need for my version:

• 2.5 cups old fashioned oats (and a blender/food processor)
• 2-3 large bananas 1 cup mashed (very easy if you throw in the blender post oats)
• 2 large eggs lightly beaten
• 1/2 cup apple sauce (or your choice of sweetener)
• 2.5 cups shredded zucchini peeled or unpeeled
• 2 tsp baking powder
• 1/2 tsp baking soda
• 1/2 tsp salt
• 1 tsp cinnamon
• 1/3 cup chocolate chips (this is a non-negotiable)

Other fun ideas:

• Swap 1/2 cup oat flour for flaxseed because why not
• Toasted walnuts in addition to chocolate chips
• Add shredded carrot/apple for added texture & color

With love and sticky fingers,

Sarah Belle

From head to toe: Day-to-night, leather & lipstick

I'm not going to lie to you- my 'night' plans after this shoot included walking to Prince St Pizza with Olivia and bundling up for dear life. No matter how cold & windy, I will take any excuse I can to throw on some lipstick, attempt a slick-back pony tail (@Gigi Hadid) and wear booties that make me approximately 6 feet tall. It is true what they say, the air is better up here.

Get my look:

Day:

Jeans: Gap 'High Rise Slim-Straight'

Jacket: Topshop 'Leather Biker Jacket'

Shirt: Old Navy 'Luxe Curved-Hem Turtleneck'

Shoes: Addidas Gazelle

Hat: Vintage, similar here

Purse: All Saints, similar here

Night:

Shoes: Madewell, similar here

Belt: ASOS Western Belt

Lipstick: Hourglass Lip Liner in 'Icon'

Earrings: Treasure Imports 

Photo credit & many thanks to go my patient photographer Olivia!! 

With love and goosebumps,

Sarah Belle

From head to toe: black, white & red all over

"What is black, white & read all over?" A newspaper! On today's headline- me. On my continual quest to be a Hadid sister, this look was a major milestone. I saw Bella wearing this a while back and when I saw these jeans in the Anthro sale section I knew my time had come. Even the Whitney Museum is on board with the monochromatic trend. 

My city just gets me. 

My look:

Sweater: Gap, similar here

T-shirt: Brandy Melville Hailie Top

Jeans: Anthropologie, similar here

Shoes: Addidas Gazelles

Sunglasses: Anthropologie, similar here

Bag: All Saints Fleur De Lis

With love and monochrome, 

Sarah Belle